How to Make a Man Happy

Gratitude instead of criticism, support instead of control, forgiveness instead of guilt. Ten things that turn the man beside you into a king.

How do you make your man happier?

After yesterday’s post about how to make a woman happy, several women asked me to write about what makes a man happy.

Everything I describe below is only worth doing sincerely. If you don’t actually feel that way, don’t put on an act. It will show. Manipulation and playacting have never made a single relationship good.

1. Gratitude. When a man hears appreciation from you for what he does, he will want to do it even more. It doesn’t matter whether he washed his own plate or finished renovating your parents’ house. Small things and big things alike deserve a “Thank you! You’re amazing.”

2. Criticising a man makes him shut down, take offence and pull away from you emotionally. It creates nothing; it only kills. If criticism from a woman worked, the situation would have changed by now. Instead it only gets worse. So it is not worth using.

3. Women often look very rough at home, but when getting ready for a meeting that matters to them they look stunning.

I am not urging you to wear makeup and heels at home all the time. But it seems logical to me to dress beautifully — and sometimes provocatively — for your own man rather than for strangers.

If a wife seduces her husband with touch and with words, wears sexy lingerie and stockings and initiates sex herself, why would he go looking at 18+ sites, let alone at another woman?

Disclaimer: when a woman doesn’t do this, it does not justify a man’s cheating or porn use by even 1%. I am only pointing out that a man who is sexually satisfied by his wife does not look elsewhere.

4. When a wife tells her man what she thinks of him and that he is the best man on the planet for her, it gives him wings.

No man has ever grown tired of hearing: “I’m proud of you. You make me happy. I’m so lucky to have you. You’re the only one I need. I’m so glad I met you.”

Words and an attitude like that show a man that he is valued, respected, loved and admired.

5. If a woman encourages her man’s hobbies and his time with friends, he will be happy. My Nastya always encourages my trips with the guys to the sauna, the basketball court or the training range.

6. If a woman works on her emotional intelligence, she will control herself and her emotions reasonably well. When you are hashing things out, that is what lets you keep your voice down, avoid personal attacks and not say things you’ll regret.

7. An easy temperament and a sense of humour. When a woman can laugh at herself, smooth over sharp edges and not take a man’s careless words to heart, that becomes a good foundation for their relationship.

8. When a wife does not interfere with her man’s free will, that is the wisest thing she can do. My Nastya always supports any project or idea of mine and never tries to manage me, even when she thinks I am not acting optimally.

9. When a woman knows how to forgive and let go of resentment, the man beside her will not feel permanently guilty. Disappointment in himself is the last thing a man needs for happiness in a relationship. Men run from guilt.

10. If you are growing and working on yourself in different areas of life, he will find you interesting to be around. He sees that you are changing, becoming wiser, sexier and more attractive.

When a woman is happy in her own right, she can give that happiness to the man she loves. All of us want to arrive at a party that has already started, where things are already fun and warm.

Of course, 90% of what I am writing applies to men too — these principles are universal.

The main idea is very simple: if you treat a man like royalty, over time he can become a king beside you and start treating you like a queen.

If you treat him like some dim-witted cobbler, over time he may sink to the same opinion of himself and talk to you accordingly. And I guarantee you will not enjoy it.

Do you agree that these 10 things would make a man happier?