Men tell me they have no time for romantic gestures. Yet three or four hours for an argument always turn up. On attention and openness as the base of a happy family.
How do you make the woman beside you happy?
From what I’ve seen, the two things that matter most from a man in a relationship are attention and openness towards the woman he loves.
When a woman gets caught in the Bermuda triangle of family life — chores, children and work — it is incredibly hard for her to stay resourced enough to build a relationship with her man at all.
It’s a completely different story when a man understands that his wife needs fresh emotions the way she needs air, and at least partly makes sure she gets them:
- Arranged a day off
- Bought flowers
- Gave her a pile of compliments
- Helped out
- Ordered or cooked dinner
- Invited her for coffee in the park
The list goes on. None of this is hard to do, but it lets the woman beside you feel that she is important, loved and wanted.
When men in my consultations tell me they have no time for romantic gestures like these, I ask them where they find the three or four hours to argue with their wife and sort things out at raised voices.
Maybe it’s a better deal to find twenty or thirty minutes a day for each other than to fight through an entire weekend afterwards?
Every man understands that servicing his car every 10,000 kilometres beats ending up with a full engine rebuild at 25,000 and a month without a car.
When I explain the same logic about a wife, not everyone sees the point of that approach. I am in no way comparing a woman to a car — I’m just using an example men understand.
Before I was even married, I came across the line that “a successful man is a happy wife.” The longer I build my relationship with Nastya, the more I’m convinced of it.
When you do the most basic, elementary things in your family, the woman beside you will be grateful, joyful and happy. And you are the first one who wins from it.
Then the woman you love creates an atmosphere of love and acceptance at home, a place you want to come back to, your ambitions and drive open up, and you feel like a happy man.
Do you agree that attention and openness from a man create everything a relationship needs to be happy?
Articles do not fix relationships
Texts give you understanding, but your situation is always more specific than any text. Fifty minutes is usually enough to see where the problem actually starts.
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