Tragic, troubled or harmonious — which scenario your life follows is decided by the quality of the decisions you make.
How do you live your life in harmony?
A person can have 3 kinds of destiny:
1. The tragic one.
Vodka. Drugs. Gambling. Debt. Trouble with the law. Violence. Prison. Serious illness. Death.
2. The troubled one.
A constant shortage of money. Regular conflicts with the people you love and with everyone around you. Stress at work. Little energy and health problems. Resentment toward others and disappointment in yourself.
3. The harmonious one.
Personal capital grows every year. The relationship with the person you love reaches a new level of depth and trust every year. Your work brings a sense of meaning and joy. The value you bring to the market grows year after year. There are far more interesting opportunities than you have time and attention even to evaluate. Overall, life gets happier and more interesting with every year.
An important caveat: people with a harmonious destiny have problems and hard challenges too. But they solve them differently than people with a troubled destiny, let alone a tragic one.
Which of the 3 scenarios we follow depends on the quality of the decisions we make.
If we make very foolish decisions and run from reality, the tragic scenario will happily destroy our life.
If we are proud, closed off and “already know everything,” then life (much like elementary school) will keep holding us back a year with the same problems. We don’t want to learn — we fail the exams — so we make unwise decisions, and as a result we fight the same circumstances and the same difficulties year after year.
In a harmonious destiny, a person starts with the right questions:
- How do I find my calling, and how do I help a large number of people?
- How can I make sure my relationships with the people I love keep developing?
- How can I strengthen my immune system enough that I almost never get sick? How do I keep my energy levels high?
- How do I make it so that clients find me on their own?
- How do I grow my personal capital every year? Which financial habits do I need to build to reduce money stress to a minimum?
- Which specialist should I turn to in order to work through myself psychologically and unlock more of my potential?
In the harmonious scenario, when a person runs into a problem, they create a rule. They try to solve the problem at the root.
I remember sitting in a dentist’s chair about 5 years ago, getting a filling. While my tooth was being drilled, I was thinking: not everyone has cavities. I asked the dentist what I needed to do so that my teeth would never be drilled again. He said — don’t eat sugar. Walking out of his office, I cut the amount of sugar in my life down to an absolute minimum. My teeth have never been drilled since.
That’s a simple example of solving a problem systemically.
We all live in a society where the overwhelming majority of people around us live out a troubled or a tragic scenario. If we want to make our life more harmonious over time, we can learn from people how not to do things. By way of contrast.
People spend a lot of time aimlessly on their phone? You can replace the phone with books.
People spend everything they earn? You can start setting money aside and building an investment portfolio.
People constantly argue and shout at each other at home? You can start learning how to build a relationship.
People eat whatever comes along, don’t train, keep no routine? You can study books on nutrition, take up sport and get a routine in place.
People worry about things they can’t influence? Try to remake each other? You can invest 10 hours into studying emotional intelligence, to train yourself to be happy and cheerful no matter what.
Each of us chooses which of these 3 scenarios to follow. We are the authors of our own life and our own choices.
Personally, I believe God wants a good, happy destiny for every one of us. But He gave us free will to make our own decisions and to reap exactly the results in life that we sow every day with our choices.
Do you see people with a troubled destiny around you?
Do you think it’s possible to live your life in the 3rd scenario?
Want to go deeper?
Reading helps, but what changes a life is specific steps, not reading. Fifty minutes of conversation is usually enough to see which steps are yours.
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